Echoes of Silence - When the law fails Women

How legal and cultural neglect shaped my childhood trauma - and my journey toward awareness and healing

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It still astonishes me to learn that marital rape in Switzerland wasn’t punishable by law until 2004. By comparison, Canada had already recognized it as a crime in 1983—more than two decades earlier. Switzerland’s delay speaks volumes about how ancient traditions held women’s rights back.

This delay in justice isn’t just a modern issue. About 240 years ago, the last woman in Switzerland accused of being a witch was executed in a grotesque display of outdated justice. Other cantons attempted to intervene, recognizing the practice as archaic and out of alignment with new laws; yet tradition prevailed. This woman was ultimately beheaded, her remains burned and dispersed, and later, authorities tried to cover it up, claiming the remains were from cats.

This historical injustice echoes into the present, highlighting how difficult it can be for more isolated communities to evolve and align with modern values.

Looking back, this realization explains so much. It sheds light on why many women I knew growing up seemed dissociated or trapped in cognitive dissonance. Those are signs of trauma. It also makes sense why many men believed they were entitled to sex within marriage.

As a childhood sexual abuse survivor, understanding these laws has been eye-opening. They didn’t just affect women in marriages—they shaped the entire environment I grew up in. These legal gaps made it almost impossible for me to report what happened, to be acknowledged, heard, or validated. They undermined my sense of safety and my ability to be seen and understood. I believe the weight of those laws also silenced my mother. She may have carried guilt for not being able to protect me, but the truth is, the laws themselves worked against her.

There’s another painful layer to this. I know some men held the mindset that if their wives denied them sex, they could turn to the children instead. Even more disturbingly, they might have rationalized this by blaming the wife for their actions—holding her responsible (refusal of sex) for what they chose to inflict on the children. This dark logic, born of entitlement and upheld by law, created an environment where abuse could thrive unchecked.

At the time, I wasn’t fully aware of the laws. I only felt the weight of what wasn’t being said, the silences and justifications. Today, I find myself shocked that women were still willing to marry under those conditions. I can’t help but wonder;

if they had truly understood the legal reality, how many might have made different choices, if they could?

What happened in Switzerland is more than a historical footnote—it’s a reminder of how laws shape culture, and how culture, in turn, shapes people’s lives, safety, and even their silence.

And this is why speaking out matters. When we break the silence around these histories, we not only honor survivors but also open space for change. By acknowledging the ways outdated laws and traditions have shaped trauma, we empower ourselves and future generations to demand justice, safety, and recognition.

Healing begins when we see clearly, when we speak truthfully, and when we refuse to let silence dictate the lives of women and children. Remembering and reflecting on the past is not just an act of awareness—it is an act of liberation. Through this conscious awakening, we reclaim our voices, our safety, and our right to be fully seen and heard.

Humanity has long been in conflict with its own shadows, and now we are collectively awakening from lower consciousness into higher awareness. We are stirring from the deep sleep of unconsciousness, a state that has persisted for eons, clearly reflected in the ways women were treated as second or third-class citizens, often controlled through systems fueled by narcissism and fear.

The way we overturn oppression and reclaim our power is by grounding ourselves in truth and reality, speaking with calm understanding, and courageously confronting the “red dragon” of injustice and control. It is through clarity, courage, and conscious awareness that we rise above the patterns that have held humanity back for so long.

I’ve been invited to be part of Fearless Events and write an article in a fearless women's magazine, and it made me reflect on what that truly means in connection with this article.

I am not fearless. But every day, I choose not to let fear dictate my choices, my feelings, or my mindset.

Remembering the past and awakening to your truth is an act of empowerment. It is a step toward liberation from the constraints society has imposed on women, specifically. 

True fearlessness isn’t about denying fear. It’s about recognizing what we are afraid of, understanding why, and deciding how to move forward despite it. This process is essential for creating societal change, opening pathways to liberation, and claiming the freedom to live our lives on our own terms.

This reflection reminds me of something a good friend once asked me. She asked what I truly wanted to experience. Without thinking, I said, “ultimate freedom.” It just slipped out.

She then asked what that really meant for me. I didn’t have an immediate answer. It took some time to ponder, and even now—four years later—I’m still in the process of uncovering what this truly means for me.

I think I am starting to understand why I have felt such a deep, passionate pull toward freedom: to become more fully who I truly am, to live in alignment with my purpose, to inspire greater understanding. All the puzzle pieces—ideas, whispers my soul spoke to me so many years ago—are beginning to make sense.

Life is like a rose slowly unfurling its petals.

We become more of who we are meant to be as we move along our path, discovering why we were drawn to certain experiences or called to pursue specific things. It never makes complete sense in the beginning, because there is no final destination—there is only the becoming.

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Life is about awakening and remembering who we are, so that we can grow into who we were always meant to be.